Tuesday, July 22, 2008

My Thoughts for Today

Well, after thinking about it last night, I was going to discuss my brother but there are to many holes in the story. For the almost 10 years he was away I only know what happened to him for a few years. I don't know what got him to that point so I'm going to talk to him today to find out what happened. I need to be clear so I can post accurate information.

On a side note, I received an email from someone who stated and I won't go into detail although I did talk about what was stated in that email in my previous post, one thing that I didn't address was the fact that the email mentioned that this person wasn't sure if he should be mad at me for leaving the game? Let's review one more time. The game was causing sleepless nights, the game was causing me stress in real life, the game was taking way to much of my time that I could never get back, and thus I left the game. How can anyone get upset leaving that behind? Everyone is different and if lack of commitment or movement doesn't stress you out then I think you deserve the non-stress award and allow me to hand you a cookie.

I'm not you. I don't function that way. Like I said I quit the game and was asked to come back and help if I could. I don't have anything against anyone in the game but if you are going to talk bad about me because I left a game that was causing me issues in real life then really what kind of person are you? You need to look at yourself in the mirror my friend. World of Warcraft is a drug it's an addictive game that most of you cannot control. Those that are married, do me a favor, ask your wife how she feels that you spend so much time away from her. Ask her how many times she wanted to go out and eat but you had a raid to go too. Have you made love with your wife? Has your wife ever said that you should have married the computer? Has she cried? Isn't it a shame that you have a partner that loves you but your not showing love in return. Sure you might spend sometime with her but you wish you were on playing. What the hell is wrong with you.

You want to know commitment. On my Anniversary I was in LA. The day of my Anniversary was also the day of a raid. I had my laptop with me so I can make the raid. Looking back at that I should have slapped myself in the face. This woman has been with me through thick and thin and here I was treating our special day like it was nothing. I should have skipped the raid but my commitment to the guild and progression caused me to make the raid. Not one of you said, Dyce we have this, go spend time with wife. Not one of you talked any sense to me. It's like passing me the drugs so I can take a hit even though you know it would kill me. The only thing that eveyrone cared about was the raid and that included me. I'm a big boy so it was my choice the make but nobody stopped me nor did anyone say anything and yes people knew because I told them I was going to LA for my Anniversary. Let me ask you, if you knew I was drunk would you allow me to drive? Would you say, your a big boy, you can make your own choice? When someone is addicted to anything, it's hard to say if they are in the right frame of mind.

I think you get my point. Everything is only about the game. I have some concerns. Did anyone else pray for Zag's safe return while he was in Iraq? Nope, he was forgotten about till he logged on. I prayed for Zag. I prayed for him daily. From the moment he was gone and the relief I felt when he returned. I never told him that . So Husbands, go ask you wife how she feels about the game? Do you have children that play? Do they spend most of their time playing? Here's one, have you skipped work because you wanted to play? If you answered yes to any of these area's that concern you then you have a problem.

Trinidad was the first to break away from the game. He was sick of it. Vato who I kept in contact with after he left the game talked the most sense to me about the game. I didn't realise how much of a addict I was. I remember staying up the entire weekend just so I can level. When I needed to farm, I would set the alarm clock so I can wake up before work and farm. Talk about being an addict. A short but true story of someone who decided to quit World of Warcraft.

In the afternoon of November 23 of 2004, after my last class of the day, I headed to a computer store where I had reserved a copy of World of Warcraft Collector's Edition. Three years later, I look back and I realize how I almost ruined my life with a computer game.

I am an undergraduate in Software Engineering. I feel kind of silly writing this, but I will share my true story with the intent of helping somebody who might be going through what I went through. I hope this will not bore you.

I was addicted to WoW during my first year of university. I seemed to be a pretty dedicated student; I did not miss any lectures and took detailed notes. However, my head would wander elsewhere—be it sketching my character, building its skills and planning the next quests. As an active member of a guild, I was the first to get a mount. Every day of my life led to the same—as soon as I got home, I would go straight to the computer and log in to WoW. My idea of having a good time was spending hours and hours in front of the screen completing quests, leveling up and earning gold at the auction house. All was fun until I saw my first transcript: A+, C+, C+, C, C-, D+, D, D-, D- and D-.

With these results, I had a GPA of 1.96. In my institution, you need to keep it higher than 2.00, or else you get expelled. I decided to take a definite and concrete action. Not only did I uninstall WoW from my computer but also I completely eliminated games from my life. If I told you that I even removed the solitaire card game that comes with Windows, you would probably laugh, but I really wanted to stick with my resolution.

I also changed my studying habits. I stayed long hours at the university, reading lectures in advance, redoing exercises, rewriting notes—I pretty much lived at the library at that point. When I got my transcript I thought it was someone else's: A, A, A, A-, B, B, B, B, B-, D+ and D-.

I knew that if I could stay focused and stick to my study routine, I would do even better. I was not mistaken. Here is my transcript for the third year: A+, A, A, A-, A-, A-, B+ and B-. Nothing below a B-grade, and now I have a cummulative GPA of 3.02. That is only one side of my life that changed. Since I quit, I have met many interesting people, including a gorgeous and smart girl who is now my fiancée. Some will say that it was not the game that influenced me but it was I who had problems in the first place; that might have been the case. I agree that games do not ruin lives, people ruin lives; all I can say is that I am a much more complete and happy person now.............................................................................................................................................................

I wonder if his guild talked bad about him or was even angry at him for leaving a game that was causing him to fail in class? He made the right choice. So before you get all pissed of at me for leaving a game that was causing me so much stress, you need to look at my reasons why and accept that I just had enough for the time being. My subscrtion is due in August and I have not renewed it. I have not changed my name. I have not applied to any other guild. I have not done anything in warcraft at all. I gave it up just as I had planned before. I want to get on with my life without having a game control it.

Any game that requires that much time isn't good for you. If you can balance it, then sure no problem but most can't. If you are spending more than 4 hours sitting behind a computer playing the game, only getting up to piss and take a dump then you have issues. If you get home from work and the first thing you do is turn on the computer to log on, then you have issues. If you call in sick in order to play, you have issues. Oh but I have vacation time, then you just used a day of your sick leave or vacation time to play, you have issues. If you rented movies but didn't watch some of them because you were playing, you have issues. If your grades in school are failing because you are focused on the game rather than your school work, then you have issues. If you disagree with me on any of these proven points, then you have issues. If you have gained weight because all you did was sit behind a computer and you deny your weight gain, then you have issues. If you look at things in the real world and want to put a skull on it, you have issues. If you cannot discuss anything else with your friends other than the game, then you have issues.

YOU HAVE ISSUES. YOU HAVE ISSUES. I don't care if people play but don't allow any game to run your life. Like I said, it's seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, and years that you will never get back and before you know it, you will wonder what you did with your life.

Here is another true Wow Story:

My Husband started playing WOW almost 2 years ago and our marriage has slowly deteriorated since. A friend of his gave him a free 10 day trial and he actually asked if I cared if he tried it out and I said sure its a free try why not, I can't tell you how much I regret that statement.

First he played a couple of hours ata time then he announced friday nights were now his Raid night and I could not make plans that included him on fridays from then on. I asked for him to talk to the other 50 raid people to see if they could switch it and he said no, he said that was the night that worked for everyone else (regardless of whether it worked for his family). I was told to expect this indefinitly. Every date night essentially gone.

In addition to Raid night He started playing every night after dinner, the routine was, he'd come home, have dinner watch an hour of TV with me, then go play until midnight or so. Later he told me that OTHER players were having a hard time with the friday thing so they changed it to Wednesday AND Thursdays instead. OTHER people had a hard time so they moved it, it didn't seem to matter that I had a hard time with it but, at least other players cared what their wives or family thought or needed. He also has a raid o sunday afternoons now which don't seem as urgent so, he does miss them every now and then.

His MD started him on this drug for his ADD and he now plays until 3 or 4am almost every single night of the week. He gets up at the last possible second, has a shower and barely makes it to work on time. He does not eat breakfast or make coffee anymore and of course buys his lunch IF he remembers to eat during the day at all.

He gets home and is so hungry he'll have a huge dinner and then after I go to bed, he'll binge on something else (Like a whole bag of Nachos or A tub of frozen Yogurt). I don't keep a lot of junk in the house but even a whole tub of frozen yogurt right before bed can make you fatter. His weight has shot up and he weighs close to 100 pounds more then when we met. I don't know what to do anymore, i've tried so many times to talk to him and he just doesn't listen. He's cut off friends who aren't gamers and doesn't talk to his family much anymore.

If plans are to be made, I make them and its often a battle to get him to go. We don't have kids although I want at least one. I just see how neglectful he is of me and our dog (yells at him if he noses him to get some attention, doesn't remember to feed or water him in the AM cause he's so rushed) and I don't want to put a child through that. I don't want to get divorced but it's starting to look like the only solution. I miss the man I married, the guy who was fun, who loved to hike and take our dog for runs together. I feel like a failure because I wasn't enough to keep him interested and that really hurts..................................................................................................................

Very sad isn't it. I hope and pray this doesn't happen to any of you because of gaming.

Till then this is my thoughts. Tomorrow I have a special treat. Our very own Cedes Aka Chococow in a play called Heaven can wait. I hope you will enjoy it as much as I did and thank you Choco for giving me permission to post it.

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