It's never easy

When you lose someone you love. Doesn't matter what it is really. Cat or Dog, they have become part of the family. I wish at times that I could feel that way toward a pet but sadly I don't and the reasons behind it has to do with when I lost my cat in death.

Oliver Sunshine was his name. He was my baby. I was around when Jesse was a boy. I was so close to him. He was my best friend. I know it's weird but it felt as if he knew what I felt.

When he died, I cried hard. That was my cat. Since then, It's been hard for me to get close to any pets. They are nice to have but my heart has yet to open to any pets. I refuse to get close to any other pets. You can't replace what you lost.

If I lost Jesse. I can't replace Jesse. If I lost my wife, I can't replace my wife. I lost my friend, he has never been replaced. The pets I have now, they are only here because of what they do.

Take for example Nala. Her sister we gave up. She kept going pee on the floor in the kitchen. Not acceptable so we had to give her up. Our dogs are trained to use paper in a specific spot in the house. One of the dogs started to pee on the floor, that was it.

I felt bad but my wife and I felt it was for the best. We kept Nala only because Nala is a guard dog. When the kids are in the back yard, Nala is out with them. If anyone comes near the fence, Nala barks letting us know that someone is there. It never fails. Last week, it was dark and we forgot to close the shed door so my wife did us a favor and went to close it.

There was someone in our yard. Jesse came to get me, I got Nala and we made our way to the back. At first sight, she started barking and ready to attack. The kid that came into our yard was looking for his football.

I told him that I was ready to jump on him but noticed he was a kid. So Nala is with us only because she protects.

We also have a Cat. His name is Nemo. Nemo is only with us because for a bit, we had a mice issue and it felt like it wasn't going away. So we purchased Nemo and Hairless cat. The kind of cat you see in the Austin Powers movies. Once he came into the house, All the mice were gone and never returned. He caught at least 4. The mice never returned.

Nemo has a purpose which is to keep mice away. That's why he's here. So pets have their place. I know the others feel different but my heart was sealed when my friend died so long ago and in truth, pets don't live as long as humans so I didn't want to feel that pain again of losing anyone.

So, I'm very sorry that meatball died. I know how you feel. You didn't lose a dog, you lost a friend a brother but don't be like me and close yourself off. I don't want to feel that pain but at the same time, I'm not enjoying the closeness a pet can bring.