To see her smile again would be a gift. To hear her voice again would heal my heart. All I need is but a moment for her to wake so I can tell her that I love her and that I will miss her.
Just a moment. Just one minute so that I can hold her in my arms. My heart is broken in ways I can't explain. It's broken in ways that only happened once before. It's one thing to lose Dad but MOM I refuse to lose. I can't lose her. Not yet. There is so much I have to say.
So much I have to say sorry for. I hated that I was such a bad son to her growing up. I took her to a concert. It was salsa and she had her dancing shoes on. I didn't get up and dance with her. I was a little shy which normally doesn't happen to me.
If she comes back to me, I will take her dancing. I will see her everyday without letting a day go by where I don't see her or talk to her. Mom.....
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
I wasn't sure
Where else to put this. I realized that this area is more or less an escape. This area is a place where I can pour out my heart and cry. Truth is...My mother is dying. She suffered two stokes and a heart attack. She's in the hospital in critical condition.
The Doctors have said that what happened to her is fatal. Right now at this moment. The only place I felt comfort is work so I came to work. The only place I felt I needed to pour my heart out is here.
I love you so much mom.
The Doctors have said that what happened to her is fatal. Right now at this moment. The only place I felt comfort is work so I came to work. The only place I felt I needed to pour my heart out is here.
I love you so much mom.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Life
Is very interesting. It's true that we are only here for a moment and could be gone the next. When we close our eyes to sleep, that could be the very last time we open our eyes in this system.
In this system there are so many things that could happen that could change life as we know it. One of my biggest fears was to lose my wife while delivering any one of our children and sure enough it almost happened.
What would my life be today with her. How could I wake to an empty pillow. How could I wake without seeing her face in the morning. Then I think of my kids. Although Jesse is 18 now he is still my baby, my first born. I often worry about him when he out late playing basketball.
One of my fears almost happened when Joshua almost died. I am thankful for life each day but I know that any one of my fears can happen. That's why I'm so thankful that there is a purpose for life. There is a chance of making it into a world where we don't have to worry, where we don't have to panic.
Sounds like a dream but if you were God would you have it any other way? If you had the same powers as God wouldn't you do the same? Why would he do any less? Even if a person didn't know the Truth, think about it why would God create the Earth in the first place if people went to Heaven? Why would any go to Hell if a person dies, his or her sins are forgiven?
So I trust in Jehovah that he will indeed keep his promise to transform this Earth that he created into a place where all of our fears will go away. Hope....
In this system there are so many things that could happen that could change life as we know it. One of my biggest fears was to lose my wife while delivering any one of our children and sure enough it almost happened.
What would my life be today with her. How could I wake to an empty pillow. How could I wake without seeing her face in the morning. Then I think of my kids. Although Jesse is 18 now he is still my baby, my first born. I often worry about him when he out late playing basketball.
One of my fears almost happened when Joshua almost died. I am thankful for life each day but I know that any one of my fears can happen. That's why I'm so thankful that there is a purpose for life. There is a chance of making it into a world where we don't have to worry, where we don't have to panic.
Sounds like a dream but if you were God would you have it any other way? If you had the same powers as God wouldn't you do the same? Why would he do any less? Even if a person didn't know the Truth, think about it why would God create the Earth in the first place if people went to Heaven? Why would any go to Hell if a person dies, his or her sins are forgiven?
So I trust in Jehovah that he will indeed keep his promise to transform this Earth that he created into a place where all of our fears will go away. Hope....
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Life is never easy
I often wondered what kind of person was I going to be in life. Would I end up in prison like my father. Would I end up dead like so many of my friends. I never knew that I would end up becoming a witness.
It wasn't easy to become who I am today. I had so many internal issues to deal with. I had to think about those who claimed to love me and would die for me but all they would do in the end was stab me in the back.
Those that I thought were friends were nothing but bad influences that if I held onto those, I wouldn't be where I am today. It didn't matter to me that they would talk about me behind my back because I became a witness.
It didn't matter to me what my family thought. Matter of fact, my mother was very supportive of my choices because she saw the changes. She knew it was positive although she didn't understand it. She supported my choices because in life.
My brother however did not. We haven't spoken for years. I cannot understand why. He should love me no matter what I choose in life but being a witness isn't easy and it wasn't meant to be easy. If Jesus was treated badly, we should expect the same.
Sometimes doing the right thing can be hard but nobody said doing the right thing is easy. Life is never easy....
It wasn't easy to become who I am today. I had so many internal issues to deal with. I had to think about those who claimed to love me and would die for me but all they would do in the end was stab me in the back.
Those that I thought were friends were nothing but bad influences that if I held onto those, I wouldn't be where I am today. It didn't matter to me that they would talk about me behind my back because I became a witness.
It didn't matter to me what my family thought. Matter of fact, my mother was very supportive of my choices because she saw the changes. She knew it was positive although she didn't understand it. She supported my choices because in life.
My brother however did not. We haven't spoken for years. I cannot understand why. He should love me no matter what I choose in life but being a witness isn't easy and it wasn't meant to be easy. If Jesus was treated badly, we should expect the same.
Sometimes doing the right thing can be hard but nobody said doing the right thing is easy. Life is never easy....
Monday, December 6, 2010
What's up Blood
Back in the days of Noah, an ancestor of all mankind, God laid down a remarkable law. While granting humans the right to eat the flesh of animals, he forbade them to consume the blood. (Genesis 9:4)
He also gave them his reason, equating blood with the soul, or life, of the creature. He later said: “The soul or life is in the blood.” In the eyes of the Creator, blood is sacred. It represents the precious gift of life that each living soul possesses. God restated this principle again and again.—Leviticus 3:17; 17:10, 11, 14; Deuteronomy 12:16, 23.
Shortly after Christianity was founded , believers were given the divine commandment to “abstain from . . . blood.” The prohibition was based, not on health concerns, but on the sacredness of blood. (Acts 15:19, 20, 29) Some argue that this God-given restriction applies only to the eating of blood, but the word “abstain” speaks for itself. If a doctor told us to abstain from alcohol, we would hardly feel at liberty to inject it into our veins.
The Bible further explains why blood is so sacred. The shed blood of Jesus Christ, representing the human life that he gave in behalf of mankind, is key to the Christian hope. It means forgiveness of sins and hope of eternal life. When a Christian abstains from blood, he is in effect expressing his faith that only the shed blood of Jesus Christ can truly redeem him and save his life.—Ephesians 1:7.
For some, that is hard to understand. We live in a world that holds very little as sacred. Life itself is rarely valued as it should be. Little wonder, then, that blood is bought and sold like any other commodity. But those who respect the Creator’s wishes do not treat it that way. ‘You must not eat blood’ was God’s command to Noah and his descendants—all mankind. (Genesis 9:4) Eight centuries later He put that command in his Law to the Israelites. Fifteen centuries later he reaffirmed it once again to the Christian congregation: ‘Abstain from blood.’—Acts 15:20.
Jehovah’s Witnesses hold to that law primarily because they want to obey their Creator. By means of the sacrificial death of his own beloved Son, the Creator has already provided mankind with lifesaving blood. It can prolong life not just for a few months or years but forever.—John 3:16; Ephesians 1:7.
Jehovah’s Witnesses, are determined to ‘abstain from blood.’ Hence, we do not donate blood, nor do we store for transfusion our blood that should be poured out. That practice conflicts with God’s law.
He also gave them his reason, equating blood with the soul, or life, of the creature. He later said: “The soul or life is in the blood.” In the eyes of the Creator, blood is sacred. It represents the precious gift of life that each living soul possesses. God restated this principle again and again.—Leviticus 3:17; 17:10, 11, 14; Deuteronomy 12:16, 23.
Shortly after Christianity was founded , believers were given the divine commandment to “abstain from . . . blood.” The prohibition was based, not on health concerns, but on the sacredness of blood. (Acts 15:19, 20, 29) Some argue that this God-given restriction applies only to the eating of blood, but the word “abstain” speaks for itself. If a doctor told us to abstain from alcohol, we would hardly feel at liberty to inject it into our veins.
The Bible further explains why blood is so sacred. The shed blood of Jesus Christ, representing the human life that he gave in behalf of mankind, is key to the Christian hope. It means forgiveness of sins and hope of eternal life. When a Christian abstains from blood, he is in effect expressing his faith that only the shed blood of Jesus Christ can truly redeem him and save his life.—Ephesians 1:7.
For some, that is hard to understand. We live in a world that holds very little as sacred. Life itself is rarely valued as it should be. Little wonder, then, that blood is bought and sold like any other commodity. But those who respect the Creator’s wishes do not treat it that way. ‘You must not eat blood’ was God’s command to Noah and his descendants—all mankind. (Genesis 9:4) Eight centuries later He put that command in his Law to the Israelites. Fifteen centuries later he reaffirmed it once again to the Christian congregation: ‘Abstain from blood.’—Acts 15:20.
Jehovah’s Witnesses hold to that law primarily because they want to obey their Creator. By means of the sacrificial death of his own beloved Son, the Creator has already provided mankind with lifesaving blood. It can prolong life not just for a few months or years but forever.—John 3:16; Ephesians 1:7.
Jehovah’s Witnesses, are determined to ‘abstain from blood.’ Hence, we do not donate blood, nor do we store for transfusion our blood that should be poured out. That practice conflicts with God’s law.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Its been like 4ever
Should I Go to the Prom?
“Prom night’s also usually the first time your parents say to you, ‘Honey, enjoy yourself. We’ll see you in the morning.’”
“I remember going to a school dance where there were only two chaperons, and they weren’t even paying attention to the kids.”
YOUR classmates have been talking about it for months. After all, the senior prom is a once-in-a-lifetime event. And since you will be saying good-bye to classmates you have known for years, you might naturally want to be there. “Ever since junior high school,” says one 18-year-old girl, “I’ve wanted to attend the prom.”
In some lands the senior prom—a formal dance preceding graduation from high (secondary) school—is a real milestone for youths. More than simply a gala social event, the prom is a time-honored ritual marking the passage into adulthood. Says Seventeen magazine: “Prom night’s also usually the first time your parents say to you, ‘Honey, enjoy yourself. We’ll see you in the morning.’ Staying out all night is not only okay—it’s what you’re supposed to do.”
Not that all youths plan an all-night session of dubious conduct. Rather, many simply look forward to a beautifully romantic experience—the chance to be a modern-day Cinderella or Prince Charming! “It’s like a fantasy,” says 19-year-old Darcey. “They step out of their rented limousine, take pictures, and show off in front of their friends. It’s their moment in the spotlight.”
Less glamorous in style, but also popular, are school dances. “Every now and then, you need a gathering just to have a good time,” says 15-year-old Jamey. But whether the appeal is the dancing, the dinner, or the dressing up, most youths feel that going to such affairs is a virtual obligation. Their only concerns are who they will go with, what they will wear, and how they will get the money to pay for the evening. But there are some other things you may need to consider.
Looking Beyond the Glitter
Jesus Christ himself was one who attended respectable social gatherings. (Compare Luke 5:29; John 2:1, 2.) But “revelries,” or “wild parties,” are condemned in the Bible. (Galatians 5:21; Byington) In the first century, wild orgies in which pagans would openly engage in “deeds of loose conduct, lusts, excesses with wine, revelries, drinking matches, and illegal idolatries” were common. Christians were therefore warned against attending these unruly affairs.—1 Peter 4:3, 4.
What about proms and school dances? Some may be well organized and supervised, thus relatively tame events. Rowdy behavior may be discouraged and dealt with swiftly if it occurs. But behind the glitter and glamor of many—if not most—proms, there often lurks the spirit of revelry. “There’s a lot of sexual immorality and drinking,” one teenager told Awake! Alcoholic beverages may officially be off-limits. But a lot of drinking may go on in rest rooms, stairwells, and parking lots.
The Bible warns: “Wine is a ridiculer, intoxicating liquor is boisterous.” (Proverbs 20:1) Add now some wild or sensuous music, unrestrained dancing, dimmed lighting, and a crowd of youths who may have little appreciation for Bible principles, and you have the ingredients for revelry. Can you count on the chaperons to keep things under control? Not always. A teenager named Charles says bluntly: “Chaperons do nothing.” Unfair? Not according to young Darcey, who says: “I remember going to a school dance where there were only two chaperons, and they weren’t even paying attention to the kids.”
It must be admitted that even the most conscientious of chaperons may find it next to impossible in a darkened ballroom or gymnasium to control a crowd of youths who are bent on having a ‘good time.’ As a result, the dream of an evening of romance can quickly turn into a nightmare. “There are a lot of fights,” says one teenage girl.
Compromising Situations
Granted, not all proms or school dances erupt into violence. Still, there is the very real danger that you may be thrust into a potentially compromising situation. Recalls one young woman: “When you’re dancing cheek to cheek with boys, their hands start wandering all over you. They expect you to accept it!” Could you not avoid such a problem simply by keeping to yourself? Perhaps. But that is often easier said than done.
Suppose you go unescorted or go with a group of friends. One teenager reminds us: “Some boys are there by themselves, and they try to go after as many girls as they can.” There may also be a fair number of aggressive girls there. A youth who goes alone can easily become the target of unwanted attention.
On the other hand, having a fellow believer as an escort can create yet other complications. After all, dating is taken seriously by Jehovah’s Witnesses today. And even if you feel sure that your escort has no romantic interest in you, to what extent can he or she really serve as a protection? Notes 19-year-old Lora: “What’s going to prevent others from cutting in as you dance—or asking you to go out with them? What happens then?” A tense, awkward situation can easily develop.
Not to be overlooked, either, is the danger of letting your guard down and getting caught up in the spirit of the occasion yourself. Bad associations do “spoil useful habits.” (1 Corinthians 15:33) Admits an 18-year-old named Nick: “Even if two of Jehovah’s Witnesses went together, they could easily be prompted to do what everybody else is doing.”
When the Party’s Over
Oftentimes, though, the real problems arise after the party. “Some go to a hotel or to somebody’s house,” says young Tanya. Adds Yolanda: “You’re supposed to stay there all night. That’s part of the tradition.” Drugs, alcohol, and sex can also be part of the prom tradition. The morning after, however, can leave a youth with a stricken conscience, diminished self-respect, and the very real fear of pregnancy—or AIDS.
All too often, then, proms and school dances fail to live up to their promise of romance and wholesome fun and degenerate into wild parties, revelries. We are reminded that the prophet Isaiah in his day expressed God’s disapproval of gatherings that lasted “till late in the evening darkness.” The parties were complete with alcoholic beverages and music—“harp and stringed instrument, tambourine and flute.” Fun? No doubt. But Isaiah said of the partygoers: “The activity of Jehovah they do not look at, and the work of his hands they have not seen.”—Isaiah 5:11, 12.
Yes, getting into a party environment with youths who do not appreciate the Bible’s view can pose serious risks. True, not all such affairs turn into revelries, and circumstances vary throughout the world. So you and your parents must decide whether it is appropriate for you to attend. “It’s hard,” admitted one young girl, “because the prom is glamorous, and it’s such a temptation. It’s in front of you all year!”
But talking matters over with your parents or a mature Christian can help clarify things. Consider: Who will be attending the dance? What type of supervision will there be? Will alcoholic drinks be served? What kind of music will be played? Have there been problems in past years? How would being a part of such an affair be viewed by others—especially fellow Christians? Could attending put a stumbling block before some?—1 Corinthians 10:23, 24, 32.
In view of all the problems associated with proms and school dances, Christian youths would consult with their parents and likely decide not to attend. But is not your graduation an accomplishment to be proud of? Of course! Likely, though, you can find a safer way to celebrate, perhaps by sharing your joy with fellow Witnesses. For example, your family may decide to arrange for a modest gathering or a dinner party. When such gatherings are kept to a reasonable size and are well organized, serious problems rarely develop.
Such a gathering may lack the glitter and glamour of a formal school prom. But it can still be a happy occasion—free of the pitfalls a prom or school dance may present. Best of all, you will be in harmony with Paul’s words at 1 Corinthians 10:31: “Whether you are eating or drinking or doing anything else, do all things for God’s glory.”
...............................................................
I thought of this awake in light of all I hear. I may not be the best witness in the world but I know where I need to improve. I know that nothing is worth giving up my life for. My children need me and my wife is waiting for me to do what Jesus said I should do. I realize that in this system, life can creep up and swallow you if you are not careful.
If you are a witness and you start to think that proms are ok then you have to check yourself. When you cross lines that shouldn't be crossed, in a sense you lose who you are because you think other things in life are important.
Nothing is worth falling out of favor with Jehovah. I learned tonight where I am lacking and my intention is to improve. My intention is to help my entire family improve.
I would be 100 percent disappointed to find out that my son didn't listen to Jehovah. Life is his choice but choices should also come from others. Like those who wish to become witnesses. It's their choice, nothing really holds them back but themselves. There are many things in this world that Jehovah protects us from. There is a reason why he does so. There is reason why we should listen.
We see the results in others. We see how life turns out. Then those who didn't listen end up reaping what they sow. I only want the best for my family even if that means I have to give my all.
“Prom night’s also usually the first time your parents say to you, ‘Honey, enjoy yourself. We’ll see you in the morning.’”
“I remember going to a school dance where there were only two chaperons, and they weren’t even paying attention to the kids.”
YOUR classmates have been talking about it for months. After all, the senior prom is a once-in-a-lifetime event. And since you will be saying good-bye to classmates you have known for years, you might naturally want to be there. “Ever since junior high school,” says one 18-year-old girl, “I’ve wanted to attend the prom.”
In some lands the senior prom—a formal dance preceding graduation from high (secondary) school—is a real milestone for youths. More than simply a gala social event, the prom is a time-honored ritual marking the passage into adulthood. Says Seventeen magazine: “Prom night’s also usually the first time your parents say to you, ‘Honey, enjoy yourself. We’ll see you in the morning.’ Staying out all night is not only okay—it’s what you’re supposed to do.”
Not that all youths plan an all-night session of dubious conduct. Rather, many simply look forward to a beautifully romantic experience—the chance to be a modern-day Cinderella or Prince Charming! “It’s like a fantasy,” says 19-year-old Darcey. “They step out of their rented limousine, take pictures, and show off in front of their friends. It’s their moment in the spotlight.”
Less glamorous in style, but also popular, are school dances. “Every now and then, you need a gathering just to have a good time,” says 15-year-old Jamey. But whether the appeal is the dancing, the dinner, or the dressing up, most youths feel that going to such affairs is a virtual obligation. Their only concerns are who they will go with, what they will wear, and how they will get the money to pay for the evening. But there are some other things you may need to consider.
Looking Beyond the Glitter
Jesus Christ himself was one who attended respectable social gatherings. (Compare Luke 5:29; John 2:1, 2.) But “revelries,” or “wild parties,” are condemned in the Bible. (Galatians 5:21; Byington) In the first century, wild orgies in which pagans would openly engage in “deeds of loose conduct, lusts, excesses with wine, revelries, drinking matches, and illegal idolatries” were common. Christians were therefore warned against attending these unruly affairs.—1 Peter 4:3, 4.
What about proms and school dances? Some may be well organized and supervised, thus relatively tame events. Rowdy behavior may be discouraged and dealt with swiftly if it occurs. But behind the glitter and glamor of many—if not most—proms, there often lurks the spirit of revelry. “There’s a lot of sexual immorality and drinking,” one teenager told Awake! Alcoholic beverages may officially be off-limits. But a lot of drinking may go on in rest rooms, stairwells, and parking lots.
The Bible warns: “Wine is a ridiculer, intoxicating liquor is boisterous.” (Proverbs 20:1) Add now some wild or sensuous music, unrestrained dancing, dimmed lighting, and a crowd of youths who may have little appreciation for Bible principles, and you have the ingredients for revelry. Can you count on the chaperons to keep things under control? Not always. A teenager named Charles says bluntly: “Chaperons do nothing.” Unfair? Not according to young Darcey, who says: “I remember going to a school dance where there were only two chaperons, and they weren’t even paying attention to the kids.”
It must be admitted that even the most conscientious of chaperons may find it next to impossible in a darkened ballroom or gymnasium to control a crowd of youths who are bent on having a ‘good time.’ As a result, the dream of an evening of romance can quickly turn into a nightmare. “There are a lot of fights,” says one teenage girl.
Compromising Situations
Granted, not all proms or school dances erupt into violence. Still, there is the very real danger that you may be thrust into a potentially compromising situation. Recalls one young woman: “When you’re dancing cheek to cheek with boys, their hands start wandering all over you. They expect you to accept it!” Could you not avoid such a problem simply by keeping to yourself? Perhaps. But that is often easier said than done.
Suppose you go unescorted or go with a group of friends. One teenager reminds us: “Some boys are there by themselves, and they try to go after as many girls as they can.” There may also be a fair number of aggressive girls there. A youth who goes alone can easily become the target of unwanted attention.
On the other hand, having a fellow believer as an escort can create yet other complications. After all, dating is taken seriously by Jehovah’s Witnesses today. And even if you feel sure that your escort has no romantic interest in you, to what extent can he or she really serve as a protection? Notes 19-year-old Lora: “What’s going to prevent others from cutting in as you dance—or asking you to go out with them? What happens then?” A tense, awkward situation can easily develop.
Not to be overlooked, either, is the danger of letting your guard down and getting caught up in the spirit of the occasion yourself. Bad associations do “spoil useful habits.” (1 Corinthians 15:33) Admits an 18-year-old named Nick: “Even if two of Jehovah’s Witnesses went together, they could easily be prompted to do what everybody else is doing.”
When the Party’s Over
Oftentimes, though, the real problems arise after the party. “Some go to a hotel or to somebody’s house,” says young Tanya. Adds Yolanda: “You’re supposed to stay there all night. That’s part of the tradition.” Drugs, alcohol, and sex can also be part of the prom tradition. The morning after, however, can leave a youth with a stricken conscience, diminished self-respect, and the very real fear of pregnancy—or AIDS.
All too often, then, proms and school dances fail to live up to their promise of romance and wholesome fun and degenerate into wild parties, revelries. We are reminded that the prophet Isaiah in his day expressed God’s disapproval of gatherings that lasted “till late in the evening darkness.” The parties were complete with alcoholic beverages and music—“harp and stringed instrument, tambourine and flute.” Fun? No doubt. But Isaiah said of the partygoers: “The activity of Jehovah they do not look at, and the work of his hands they have not seen.”—Isaiah 5:11, 12.
Yes, getting into a party environment with youths who do not appreciate the Bible’s view can pose serious risks. True, not all such affairs turn into revelries, and circumstances vary throughout the world. So you and your parents must decide whether it is appropriate for you to attend. “It’s hard,” admitted one young girl, “because the prom is glamorous, and it’s such a temptation. It’s in front of you all year!”
But talking matters over with your parents or a mature Christian can help clarify things. Consider: Who will be attending the dance? What type of supervision will there be? Will alcoholic drinks be served? What kind of music will be played? Have there been problems in past years? How would being a part of such an affair be viewed by others—especially fellow Christians? Could attending put a stumbling block before some?—1 Corinthians 10:23, 24, 32.
In view of all the problems associated with proms and school dances, Christian youths would consult with their parents and likely decide not to attend. But is not your graduation an accomplishment to be proud of? Of course! Likely, though, you can find a safer way to celebrate, perhaps by sharing your joy with fellow Witnesses. For example, your family may decide to arrange for a modest gathering or a dinner party. When such gatherings are kept to a reasonable size and are well organized, serious problems rarely develop.
Such a gathering may lack the glitter and glamour of a formal school prom. But it can still be a happy occasion—free of the pitfalls a prom or school dance may present. Best of all, you will be in harmony with Paul’s words at 1 Corinthians 10:31: “Whether you are eating or drinking or doing anything else, do all things for God’s glory.”
...............................................................
I thought of this awake in light of all I hear. I may not be the best witness in the world but I know where I need to improve. I know that nothing is worth giving up my life for. My children need me and my wife is waiting for me to do what Jesus said I should do. I realize that in this system, life can creep up and swallow you if you are not careful.
If you are a witness and you start to think that proms are ok then you have to check yourself. When you cross lines that shouldn't be crossed, in a sense you lose who you are because you think other things in life are important.
Nothing is worth falling out of favor with Jehovah. I learned tonight where I am lacking and my intention is to improve. My intention is to help my entire family improve.
I would be 100 percent disappointed to find out that my son didn't listen to Jehovah. Life is his choice but choices should also come from others. Like those who wish to become witnesses. It's their choice, nothing really holds them back but themselves. There are many things in this world that Jehovah protects us from. There is a reason why he does so. There is reason why we should listen.
We see the results in others. We see how life turns out. Then those who didn't listen end up reaping what they sow. I only want the best for my family even if that means I have to give my all.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
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